Thirtytwo Teeth Crew 940

If you’re like me, and I know you are, you always keep your U-lock holstered and handy for whatever hardship and/or tribulation you may encounter during the course of a normal day.

Like posing (poseur-ing, maybe?) next to a city post office box, for example…

Now I know what you’re thinking.  “How is it possible that the dude in that shot wears the same exact size as his girlfriend,” and moreover, “where does she buy her pants?”  Well, I don’t know.  I’m sorry.  But I do know one thing.  That man knows his accessories.

Naturally, though, the question always arises: What can I do with my U-lock when it is not being used to lock my freshly powdercoated fixed-drive bicycle to the telephone pole outside Gloves?

Allow our friends from the now defunct thrashcore band, R.A.M.B.O., formerly hailing from the City of Brotherly Love to give us some insight:

(U-Lock Justice begins at exactly 2:37 into the clip.)

for every time i hear them say, get the fuck out of the way, i wil defend my right of way, that heap of steel i’m gonna slay, i’ll thrash you i’ll bash you, i’ll kick in your doors, break out your windows and scratch up your paint, apologize for oil wars, apologize for polluting my air, in some cases cars are ok, but when i’m on the street you’re all my enemies.

And for no good reason except that they put out a split 7″ with R.A.M.B.O., they like bikes, and I hung out with them a few years back in Fort Worthless, here’s one from the also defunct, Crucial Unit.

\m/     The Quest for Certaintea  (mp3 file)   \m/

As Dev always says: “Word to the herd from the big bird down in Pittsburgh.”

Whoa this song takes me back to days of thick, putrid, disgusting black and blue metal thrashcore.  Thrashity thrashin’ rad! 

xoxo,

Johnny