Are you sitting down, though? You ready for a shocker?
Click on the following bizarre image of Sheldon Brown to see something that will literally make you poop your pants as you sit at your desk while you should be working:
If you’re like me, and I know at least one of you are, you saw now-defunct Oak Cliff hardcore band Bread and Water play more time than you can count at places like 1919 Hemphill, the Wreck Room, Chris’s house, Mad Ivan’s Paintball, and various other places around the metroplex.
What you may not know is that I’ve become a bread connoisseur without even bothering to learn French. You see, man’s oldest bread recipe is a mixture of just bread and water. That’s right, with just bread and water (and maybe some salt, sugar and butter), you can make sourdough.
First, you have to make your starter. My starter was 2 cups of flour and 2 cups of water. The trick it to always use equal parts. Beat your starter in a bowl, cover it with a towel, and put it some place dark and warm. An unused oven works great, especially because mine is gas, and keeps a constant pilot lit.
Every day, check your starter. It should be getting bubbly and start to smell like beer. Daily, add 1/2 cup of mixed flour and water. Once its ready, put it in a jar or sealed container in the fridge. I like to use a mason jar with a few holes punched in the lid to let it breathe.
Perfect Starter
When your starter is ready, you’re ready to make bread. Here’s the recipe:
2 cups of starter
3 cups of flour (unbleached or whole wheat is best)
2 tablespoons of butter or olive oil
4 teaspoons of sugar
2 teaspoons of salt
Mix all ingredients. I use the “dough” cycle on my breadmaker, but never (I repeat) never bake your bread in it. Good bread is better than that.
After an hour or so of rising, punch it down, take it out and put it in your loaf, baking stone, etc. Then give it another hour or so to rise.
Put it in the over at 350 degrees, without pre-heating the oven. Cook for 30-45 minutes or until nicely browned.
That’s it, you have great, all-natural sourdough bread from scratch for pennies on the dollar.
Note: Feed your starter equal parts flour and water and put her back in the fridge for next time.
If you’re like me, and I know you are, you look at your friends merely as potential sources of rad stuff from whom you one day hope to procure said rad stuff.
And because I’m so rad, you can all take turns riding it around the ‘hood.
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Everything is adjustable to custom fit each rider including air pressure, throttle and brake responsiveness, handlebar height and angle along with foot placement. This pocket bike comes fully assembled and includes everything you need to start riding immediately. Stickers are also included for you to customize the look of your pocket rocket. Our bikes are the original Daytona models with the highest quality construction. Look at our pictures below and compare them to the imitations and you will see that our pocket bikes are built to last longer and go faster!”
Whoa, I’m sold!
Just think! This could be me!
I put Justin in charge of the money pool becuase he’s trustworthy.
