Thirtytwo Teeth Crew 940

If you’re like me, and I know you are, you just got finished watching the so-called current president of these United States speech on PBS followed by last night’s broadcast of the Daily Show with Jon Stewart interview of the former, and popularly elected president of these United States.  They may or may not have broadcast Bush’s speech on other channels, but per my conservative friend Sparky’s advice, I only follow PBS/NPR so as to avoid the influence of what he calls the “liberal media.”

And damnit if I didn’t find something to agree with Mr. Bush on tonite for the first time in, well, ever!  Who would’ve imagined that Bush wielded both the sickle and hammer!

I, for one, don’t like where this is going.  I mean, what next?  Are they going to start using our hard-earned tax money to provide univeral heath care and competitive education for all children in this country? 

Where will the madness stop?  Will it stop when our national infrastructure is top-notch, we have sufficient well-paid jobs for all Americans and our energy costs are low and on the cutting edge of new technology.  And what helps me sleep at night is that I know, of course, that there are 195 nation-states on the planet and we’re only losing a war with a couple of them, so there is hope for my tax dollars yet.

Now, I couldn’t find a video clip on either CNN or MSNBC to support my agreement, so, as you can imagine, I had to turn to our buddy and native Aussie, Rupert Murdoch for the story.

Did you catch the first line?  No?  Well lemme tell ya, I agree that “this is an extraordinary period for America’s economy.”  Pfew.  We’re like long lost cousins that George and I.

Then, after feeling fine that our money we don’t have, in the banks we didn’t invest in, is going to be just fine, we jumped (pronounced “yumped” by our immigrant brethren) over to the recently Emmy-winning “news” program, The Daily Show with Jon Stewart for a taste of what (former) president Bill Clinton, who “believes all of our extra money should have gone into alternative energy instead of houses and construction.”

Well, shit.  I don’t have a job in alternative energy, and damnit if construction doesn’t put food on my baby’s table.  Careful, Willie!  You aren’t running the show anymore, you’re wife isn’t in the running, and Sarah Palin is an election, a heartbeat and an bridge to nowhere away from being president.

You don’t believe me, fine.  Ask Matt Damon:

xoxo,

Johnny